The Funniest Headstones You’ll Ever See

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How many times have you walked through a cemetery and noticed the writing on the headstones? In my profession, I am constantly looking for names of the famous burials so I have come across wonderfully creative epitaphs on my travels. Not just the famous can be clever in death but the obscure are equally as enigmatic in their final words. As I strolled through Westwood Memorial park, famous for the burial of Marilyn Monroe, I found the grave of funny man Rodney Dangerfield.

If you look at his stone, just beneath his name reads “There goes the neighborhood”. A neighbor of Mr. Dangerfield is the great television host, Merv Griffin. His famous line “I will be right back after these messages” was changed to “I will NOT be right back after these messages.” Bringing a smile to the face of any person old enough to remember the Merv Griffin show. Just behind these famous folks is the grave of Mr. Jack Lemmon. One of the greatest stars in Hollywood, this great man had etched in stone “Jack Lemmon In…” a reference to the title pages show on the silver screen before every movie he played a role in. The amazingly talented writer/producer Billy Wilder is spending eternal rest near Jack Lemmon with his epitaph reading “I’m a writer, but then nobody’s perfect.” This was actually a final jeopardy question in 2008.

At the famous Hollywood Forever cemetery, I found the crypt of the great actress Joan Hackett. Her bronze name plate reads “Go away, I’m sleeping.” Apparently, she would utter these words from behind her dressing room door when filming when she needed privacy. No one will forget the amazingly talented Mel Blanc, voice of Bugs Bunny and hundreds of character voices for the Warner Bros. His stately grey granite stone reads the famous line by Porky Pig “That’s all folks.” At Forest Lawn Glendale is the gold niche plate of actor Ed Wynn, voice of the Mad Hatter in “Alice in Wonderland” reads “Dear God, Thanks.” At this same cemetery, A good friend pointed me to a stone that will forever be a puzzle to all who see it.

A simple bronze stone with “Factory Reject” emblazoned on the front. No name or dates just these words. Someday I would love to know the story behind this memorial. I have come across several funny stones gracious people have posted on the internet, such as the family that honored their loved one with a parking meter on the stone reading “Expired.” last but not least, the stone of unknown Micah Green reading “I see dumb people.” I hope you have enjoyed this little bit of unknown trivia found throughout my grave hunting adventures. To see more, check out

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